This Saturday we were fortunate to meet and spend several hours with the two families that have James' and David's adopted brothers. The other two families have been in relationship for a few years now, so they know each other quite well. We were not only new to the group, but we are also the family with the most and youngest of all the children...as well as the youngest set of parents which the oldest set felt the need to point out.
The night before our meeting, we sat with James after Sam was in bed and talked to him about his brothers and how we would be seeing them at a park the next day. We used the term "faraway brothers" to help with James' understanding. He liked looking at their pictures of his brothers, and he wanted to see where they lived, so my husband pulled up a map and showed him. We left plenty of time to ask questions, and mostly James wanted to know why his brothers lived faraway. He said it wasn't nice that they lived far away. James is excited that one of his brothers has a farm though. Some day in the future, we will have to try to visit them at their home because James would really enjoy that.
At the beginning on Saturday, it was a bit awkward all the way around. Here we were trying to converse with the families that have our sons' brothers and at the same time trying to pull James and Sam out of the shy shell they had hidden in. I would say for the first half hour or so, James just did his own thing and didn't care to interact with any of the new people.
Thankfully we had thought to bring along the boys' two Tonka dump trucks and one cement mixer because this is what bonded James and his older brothers for most of the day. It was amazing to see them all interacting together. James didn't want to leave when we finally said goodbye, but it was getting late, and nap time had passed a long time ago.
James has already been asking when he will see his brothers again. He recounts part of their day together, and it is very sweet.
I am so happy we have been able to establish a relationship with these other families. I know it will be beneficial to James and David as they get older. We have essentially increased our extended family in a way only adoption can do. Adoption is beautiful in so many ways, and this is just one of them.
Random thoughts and feelings in the world of an adoptive mother... I will share stories of my boys, general thoughts on parenting and/or adoption, thoughts about baby/toddler products and any other items that interest me. ***I have changed names to protect my children's identities.
Monday, October 15, 2012
Friday, October 12, 2012
Pregnant Belly
One of my friends is pregnant with her second child. We saw her and her daughter today, and after the children had played for awhile, I went to change David's diaper while my friend watched over my other two (she had offered, so I took her up on it). When I came back, I discovered James had asked her "What is in there?" pointing at her pregnant belly. I am happy with how he phrased his question because it could have been quite awkward if he had asked the same thing differently. She explained to him that a baby was in there...Anna's baby brother. My friend even let James touch her belly.
I expected more questions to come up regarding babies in bellies, but for the most part James let it rest. In the car he asked again about her belly, so I told him that a baby was in there...Anna's baby brother...babies grow in bellies. Then James asked "they take the baby out of the belly?" I told him, yes, when the baby is ready, they would take him out of the belly. I didn't have to explain anything regarding James growing in a belly (or any of my kiddos for that matter) although I was prepared to answer those questions once James took notice and was asking about my friend's pregnant belly.
I expected more questions to come up regarding babies in bellies, but for the most part James let it rest. In the car he asked again about her belly, so I told him that a baby was in there...Anna's baby brother...babies grow in bellies. Then James asked "they take the baby out of the belly?" I told him, yes, when the baby is ready, they would take him out of the belly. I didn't have to explain anything regarding James growing in a belly (or any of my kiddos for that matter) although I was prepared to answer those questions once James took notice and was asking about my friend's pregnant belly.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Overview of our Week
Life has kept me a little busy as you can tell by my lack of blog postings. I figured while I have a spare moment I will come on and give a quick update of our week thus far.
Saturday:
My husband did a mud run with some coworkers. My parents, my brother and nephew joined us (my boys and me) for a local fire station community event. There was a pancake breakfast for a nominal fee, and all the kids were free. Then there were several activities (fire station tour, allowing kids to use the fire hose to put out fire on a wooden house (the flames were wooden and fell down when the hose blasted them), allowing the kids to use a fire extinguisher to put out fires, allowing the kids to sit on the fire trucks and fire boat, etc.) We had a blast!
Sunday:
We mainly stayed at home and worked on stuff around the house to get ready for our home appraisal.
Monday:
We continued working on the house to get ready for the appraisal. Monday night my husband and I attended foster care training on FASD. The video that was shown was actually pretty decent and informative. In the past some of the videos have been quite lame, for lack of a better word.
Tuesday:
The appraiser came out, so I took the boys to the kids gym to play with some friends. They had a blast on the gymnastic equipment. James also had his first group swim lesson that evening. Only one girl was in his class with him although one more child could add in as well. He is doing a great job putting his head in the water and getting accustomed to everything.
Wednesday:
Today was James' day to have lunch with Daddy, so we had a low-key morning at home. James and Daddy went out to lunch. Then in the evening I took James to see "Finding Nemo" in 3-D (we got free tickets via some Disney DVD's we had purchased). This was James' 2nd time to see a movie in the theater. Daddy took him to see Madagascar 2 a few months back.
Thursday:
Another low-key day at home because I needed to make some chocolate chip walnut cookies for my husband to take into work tomorrow...it is their last day with their current manager (whom everyone loves). My husband asked, and his manager's favorite desserts were either chocolate chip walnut cookies or lemon bars, and I needed to make enough for 20+ people, so I went with the cookies...not to mention we had almost everything on hand to make those. Today is the first day we purposefully allowed James to stay up and not take a nap. Last night was so rough with getting him to finally go to sleep, so we decided perhaps he is ready. Today is our trial run. So far James is handling it really well.
Saturday:
My husband did a mud run with some coworkers. My parents, my brother and nephew joined us (my boys and me) for a local fire station community event. There was a pancake breakfast for a nominal fee, and all the kids were free. Then there were several activities (fire station tour, allowing kids to use the fire hose to put out fire on a wooden house (the flames were wooden and fell down when the hose blasted them), allowing the kids to use a fire extinguisher to put out fires, allowing the kids to sit on the fire trucks and fire boat, etc.) We had a blast!
Sunday:
We mainly stayed at home and worked on stuff around the house to get ready for our home appraisal.
Monday:
We continued working on the house to get ready for the appraisal. Monday night my husband and I attended foster care training on FASD. The video that was shown was actually pretty decent and informative. In the past some of the videos have been quite lame, for lack of a better word.
Tuesday:
The appraiser came out, so I took the boys to the kids gym to play with some friends. They had a blast on the gymnastic equipment. James also had his first group swim lesson that evening. Only one girl was in his class with him although one more child could add in as well. He is doing a great job putting his head in the water and getting accustomed to everything.
Wednesday:
Today was James' day to have lunch with Daddy, so we had a low-key morning at home. James and Daddy went out to lunch. Then in the evening I took James to see "Finding Nemo" in 3-D (we got free tickets via some Disney DVD's we had purchased). This was James' 2nd time to see a movie in the theater. Daddy took him to see Madagascar 2 a few months back.
Thursday:
Another low-key day at home because I needed to make some chocolate chip walnut cookies for my husband to take into work tomorrow...it is their last day with their current manager (whom everyone loves). My husband asked, and his manager's favorite desserts were either chocolate chip walnut cookies or lemon bars, and I needed to make enough for 20+ people, so I went with the cookies...not to mention we had almost everything on hand to make those. Today is the first day we purposefully allowed James to stay up and not take a nap. Last night was so rough with getting him to finally go to sleep, so we decided perhaps he is ready. Today is our trial run. So far James is handling it really well.
Friday, October 5, 2012
2 Dental Cleanings
This morning James and Sam had an appointment to get their teeth cleaned. Yesterday I got a call from the dental office saying they had checked our insurance and Sam wasn't listed on it. They asked for my husband to contact the HR department to get it sorted out. Originally my husband was told it would be 3-6 months for Sam to be added to the dental benefits, so I went ahead and rescheduled Sam's dental appointment three months out. Later that afternoon, my husband got a response saying the HR representative had contacted the dental insurance directly and had Sam added to our insurance, and he could see a dentist any day now. After that I contacted the dental office again and rescheduled Sam for this morning. What a fiasco!
So...anyway...this morning we walked over to the dental office, and the boys had fun playing while I signed some paperwork and gave our adoption order to the dental office, so Sam's information could be changed on his file. James had some x-rays taken of his teeth, and both boys were allowed to pick out a sticker. James choose a Cars 2 sticker while Sam went with a Disney princess (even though the lady had tried to hide the princess stickers under other boy type stickers).
James had his teeth cleaned first followed by Sam. Both of them did an amazing job! Then we waited for the dentist to come and inspect their mouths. Both boys have nice, healthy gums and their teeth look well cared for. It is not always easy to get the boys' teeth brushed, so it is nice that our efforts are noticed.
I am proud of how well my two boys did at the dental office. I was also happy that David stayed content in the Bjorn the whole dental visit. After the dental visit, the boys and I walked to a nearby store, and I allowed them each to pick out a toy truck for doing such a wonderful job. They also got their new toothbrushes, toothpaste and a balloon at the dental office, so they were happy boys. I was a happy mom to hear their mouths looked good. : )
So...anyway...this morning we walked over to the dental office, and the boys had fun playing while I signed some paperwork and gave our adoption order to the dental office, so Sam's information could be changed on his file. James had some x-rays taken of his teeth, and both boys were allowed to pick out a sticker. James choose a Cars 2 sticker while Sam went with a Disney princess (even though the lady had tried to hide the princess stickers under other boy type stickers).
James had his teeth cleaned first followed by Sam. Both of them did an amazing job! Then we waited for the dentist to come and inspect their mouths. Both boys have nice, healthy gums and their teeth look well cared for. It is not always easy to get the boys' teeth brushed, so it is nice that our efforts are noticed.
I am proud of how well my two boys did at the dental office. I was also happy that David stayed content in the Bjorn the whole dental visit. After the dental visit, the boys and I walked to a nearby store, and I allowed them each to pick out a toy truck for doing such a wonderful job. They also got their new toothbrushes, toothpaste and a balloon at the dental office, so they were happy boys. I was a happy mom to hear their mouths looked good. : )
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Swim Lessons
Last night I took James to a free trial swim class at a nearby indoor swimming school. This was a thirty minute one-on-one swim time to allow the child and parent to see if they want to invest in lessons. James was so excited about his swim class, he insisted we left immediately after Daddy came home from work although we had time to spare. It probably wasn't too bad getting there early because it allowed James a chance to check out the facility and watch other children having their swim lessons. James kept asking "Is it my turn now?"
When it was James' swim time, I walked him into the pool area to meet his teacher. She asked some questions about his swim/pool experience to get an idea of where to start. Then I exited the pool area (parents are requested not to be in the pool area during swim time, but there are plenty of windows surrounding the pool area to observe the lessons from) and took up a seat with a good view. It was fun to see the delightful smiles cross James' face during his swim time. I could tell a couple times James was telling his teacher "I want to do that" and pointing at a child who was doing the backstroke on their own or diving off the edge of the pool. You could see the teacher laugh and tell him something. She did let him jump into the pool before his time was over, and James was super excited about that. He talked about "making a big splash" afterward.
James had a blast and wanted to return for more swimming, so we went ahead and enrolled him in swim classes. He will have a half hour time block once a week for eight weeks. We signed him up for group lessons (3 students max) because it was more financially affordable. Also we opted for once a week instead of twice a week because we feel that might be a little much...not necessarily for James (although that may be true to) but for us transporting him and giving up those evenings each week. If for some reason, James is not retaining what he learns at swim class, we may have to consider increasing his lessons to twice a week, but we are hoping once a week will be plenty.
When it was James' swim time, I walked him into the pool area to meet his teacher. She asked some questions about his swim/pool experience to get an idea of where to start. Then I exited the pool area (parents are requested not to be in the pool area during swim time, but there are plenty of windows surrounding the pool area to observe the lessons from) and took up a seat with a good view. It was fun to see the delightful smiles cross James' face during his swim time. I could tell a couple times James was telling his teacher "I want to do that" and pointing at a child who was doing the backstroke on their own or diving off the edge of the pool. You could see the teacher laugh and tell him something. She did let him jump into the pool before his time was over, and James was super excited about that. He talked about "making a big splash" afterward.
James had a blast and wanted to return for more swimming, so we went ahead and enrolled him in swim classes. He will have a half hour time block once a week for eight weeks. We signed him up for group lessons (3 students max) because it was more financially affordable. Also we opted for once a week instead of twice a week because we feel that might be a little much...not necessarily for James (although that may be true to) but for us transporting him and giving up those evenings each week. If for some reason, James is not retaining what he learns at swim class, we may have to consider increasing his lessons to twice a week, but we are hoping once a week will be plenty.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Sam's 18 Month Check Up
This morning I took Sam to his 18 month check up. This is the first time Sam has gone to the doctor since his adoption was finalized, so we got to go to the pediatrician in town who our oldest son sees. That was nice because the doctor's office is only a five minute drive from the house. Unfortunately, the doctor's office was a little more backed up than usual, but Sam and I entertained ourselves looking at the pictures of animals on the wall and practicing their sounds. The doctor was happy with how Sam is doing and didn't have any concerns.
Height: 2' 9.5" (73rd percentile)
Weight: 26 lbs. 14.3 oz. (77th percentile)
Head Circumference: 48 cm. (61st percentile)
Sam did get the last of his Hep A shots today, but we opted out of the flu shot since last time our whole family ended up with the flu afterward. Poor Sam wasn't happy about his shot (who can blame him!?), and he called out for "Dada" when it was all over. I imagine if the roles were reversed and Daddy was there helping hold him down, he probably would have called out for me instead. I am just glad he only had to get one shot.
After Sam's appointment, we stopped at the bank to deposit some checks and get some grocery money for the month. Then we made a quick stop at a store to get overnight diapers for both Sam and David. I am hoping overnight diapers might help David sleep better because when he wakes up, his diaper is quite full, so I wonder if that is waking him up over actually being hungry. Either way it is worth a try to see if it helps or not. I also allowed Sam to pick out a treat at the store for doing so well at the doctor's office. He wanted pretzels, so I let him choose, and he picked out a box of Annie's Organic snack mix, and I was fine with that.
Height: 2' 9.5" (73rd percentile)
Weight: 26 lbs. 14.3 oz. (77th percentile)
Head Circumference: 48 cm. (61st percentile)
Sam did get the last of his Hep A shots today, but we opted out of the flu shot since last time our whole family ended up with the flu afterward. Poor Sam wasn't happy about his shot (who can blame him!?), and he called out for "Dada" when it was all over. I imagine if the roles were reversed and Daddy was there helping hold him down, he probably would have called out for me instead. I am just glad he only had to get one shot.
After Sam's appointment, we stopped at the bank to deposit some checks and get some grocery money for the month. Then we made a quick stop at a store to get overnight diapers for both Sam and David. I am hoping overnight diapers might help David sleep better because when he wakes up, his diaper is quite full, so I wonder if that is waking him up over actually being hungry. Either way it is worth a try to see if it helps or not. I also allowed Sam to pick out a treat at the store for doing so well at the doctor's office. He wanted pretzels, so I let him choose, and he picked out a box of Annie's Organic snack mix, and I was fine with that.
Monday, October 1, 2012
3 Parties, 1 Day
Yesterday was a busy day which consisted of three parties. The day started with a birthday party for twin boys who we have play dates with. Technically we met this family through our old Bible study, and it just happened that our kids play pretty well together. It was a home birthday party with a big monster truck bounce house set up in the backyard. There was a breakfast spread to eat and lots of adults and small children to talk with or watch. We got to see some people we hadn't seen in a long time, so that was really nice.
Then shortly after naps we headed over to our church for the 25th anniversary neighborhood block party. Once again there were more bounce houses and inflatable slides for the little kids and several other options for older teens and adults as well as food vendors. It was a HOT afternoon though, and the lines were pretty long, so we only lasted about an hour before our boys were ready to leave...which actually worked out well because we were able to grab some dinner before going to our aunt's house to celebrate Grandpa's birthday.
Thankfully the last party was a small family get together to celebrate Grandpa's birthday although technically my birthday and cousin Josh's birthday were also mentioned. The boys were able to run around and have fun and then have some cake and ice cream before getting ready to head home to go to sleep.
It was a rather busy day, so today we are having some down-time at home to recoup.
Then shortly after naps we headed over to our church for the 25th anniversary neighborhood block party. Once again there were more bounce houses and inflatable slides for the little kids and several other options for older teens and adults as well as food vendors. It was a HOT afternoon though, and the lines were pretty long, so we only lasted about an hour before our boys were ready to leave...which actually worked out well because we were able to grab some dinner before going to our aunt's house to celebrate Grandpa's birthday.
Thankfully the last party was a small family get together to celebrate Grandpa's birthday although technically my birthday and cousin Josh's birthday were also mentioned. The boys were able to run around and have fun and then have some cake and ice cream before getting ready to head home to go to sleep.
It was a rather busy day, so today we are having some down-time at home to recoup.
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