Poor Little Sam

Yesterday Sam took his first good spill.  He has fallen before especially since he loves to climb and stand on everything; however, this time, he managed to do a good number on his poor upper lip.  James and Sam were standing near the toy box playing, and Sam started to move around and slipped, somehow managing to fall behind the toy box (not sure how he did that exactly since there isn't much space there).  He hit the back of his head against the wall and the momentum carried him forward, and his face landed right into the back of the toy box.  Sam immediately began screaming at the top of his lungs, and I had seen the episode take place, and it looked like it hurt, so I rushed over and picked him up.  I was quite surprised at the amount of blood coming out of Sam's mouth, and I was concerned that he had done some serious damage.  After mopping up his mouth with a receiving blanket and having him chew on a cold teething ring, I convinced Sam to allow me to take a better look inside his mouth.  Fortunately nothing looked horribly wrong, but his upper lip was cut pretty good with his bottom teeth.  Poor little guy!  After Sam was content and happy again, he went back about his normal activity.  It could have been so much worse, and I sure am grateful it wasn't.

Lunch Date with James

Since Sam has become a part of our family, it seems harder for find individualized one-on-one time for the boys.  Well...it isn't always hard with Sam because often he is awake during some of James' nap.  However, the times James can get undivided attention (while Sam happens to be napping, riding bikes with Daddy, or running errands with one parent or the other), you can tell he just cherishes that time.  James is getting to the age that he appreciates having time just for him, and I can't blame him at all especially since often Sam demands attention or requires more assistance.

So today I took James on a lunch date with Mommy and left Sam behind with our aunt.  Technically this was a play date with our moms group, but the point was that James and Mommy would be spending the time together without having Sam interrupt.  Although only two other moms and their little ones ended up joining us, it was nice to visit and have the kids interact.  Not only did James get some special time along with mini hamburgers and french fries, but I was able to relax and enjoy the time because the restaurant was practically empty, and I didn't have a baby crying in my ear.  It made it less stressful, and I know James had fun.

It is important for every child to get some separate individual attention, and my goal is to make a bigger effort to make that happen for my boys...especially as they get older.  My husband and I have already talked about each of us taking one boy out to do something so they can have the attention they deserve...at least while they are young enough to want to hang out with us.  However, I am sure that even when they are older, they won't mind going go-cart racing with Dad or something along those lines.  I feel special one-on-one time helps create bonds and hopefully keeps lines of communication open as children get older and life gets more complicated.

Advent Dinner

Last night we went to the in-laws for Advent dinner.  In the past we were asked to go every Sunday of Advent for dinner, but once we had children, we requested to change that since it was too much for our family and it took up every possible weekend when December tends to be pretty busy in general.  Now my mother-in-law is happy if we attend the first Advent Sunday for dinner.

My mother-in-law always finds cute gifts for the kids to help them remember the meaning behind Christmas.  Last night they were given a bear that tells the story of Christmas when you push his foot.  Also we were given a cloth Advent calendar filled with numbered bell ornaments for every day in December counting down to Christmas.  James loves the magnetic Christmas tree we got previously where we add a numbered ornament every day in December leading to Christmas, so I am sure he will enjoy the bell ornaments as well for our real Christmas tree.

After dinner my husband, James and Grandma worked together to build a gingerbread house.  This is the first time James has done a gingerbread house, and he had a good time...mostly sticking his finger in the frosting and eating it along with some of the candies.  However, James did sprinkle lots of candies on top of the house as well.

When the gingerbread house was finished, we all went for a little walk in the neighborhood to see Christmas lights, but there weren't many to look at.  Then we headed home.  It was a busy and fun evening at the grandparents.

Christmas Tree

Yesterday we went as a family to cut down our Christmas tree.  When I say cut down our Christmas tree, I don't mean going to a Christmas tree farm and selecting a tree...I mean getting a permit and going into the national forest to chop down our tree.  This is something that my husband's family did for several years, and he wants it to be a tradition for our children, so we started doing this the year James came into our family.  It is a fun day to spend together, and the experience of picking out your own tree is very exciting even if they don't always look as full and perfectly shaped as the Christmas tree farm places.

The first year we went, it was just my husband, James and myself.  Last year my husband's cousin joined us.  This year we had both sets of grandparents along with my brother and his family come along on the Christmas tree hunt.  We learned a valuable lesson...next year if other people will be joining us, we should be more specific about how the day will work out.  We had planned on doing a picnic lunch, so we had packed our own lunches, but that didn't get communicated well, so most everyone else expected to eat out.  We ended up stopping at McDonalds and letting the little ones play for a little bit before going to purchase our permits.

This morning we pulled the Christmas tree inside the house.  We also started putting up our Christmas lights on the house.  Our tree won't have lights this year because Sam is very fascinated by electrical cords, and we don't want a huge temptation sitting there for a long period of time.  When the boys are older, we will put lights on the tree.  Later this afternoon we will decorate the tree with ornaments.

Here is a picture of our $10 tree (the cost of the permit)...of course that doesn't include the gasoline to get to the location, but it is definitely a great way to jump into the Christmas countdown.  This year we did pretty good on our tree...in the past they have been much smaller and the branches have been more spread out.

Thanksgiving

A synopsis of my day thus far and what I am grateful for...

This morning the whole family was supposed to go on a 5K run to raise money for local food banks.  We had already paid our fee, so the donation was given to the food bank; however, since the weather showed very high probability of rain, we decided the little boys and I should stay home, but my husband still planned on running, and instead he was going to do the 10K.  As my husband was about to walk out the door, James decided he wanted to run too, so I had to quickly change him into warm clothes and grab extra items that may be needed and send them both out the door.  Sam and I spent some time together dancing in the living room and watching the Macy's Thanksgiving parade on t.v.

***I'm thankful my husband is willing to take our son on fun rainy day adventures with him.
***I'm thankful Sam and I stayed home because Sam would have been miserable all soaking wet.
***I'm thankful James loves to be outdoors.

On their way home from the run, my husband and James stopped at the grocery store to get a few items...newspaper to see the Black Friday ads, overnight diapers for the little guys (we had used their last ones last night), and some items to make us a yummy egg muffin breakfast sandwich.

***I'm thankful my husband is willing to run to the store on busy days.
***I'm thankful my husband enjoys making yummy meals once in awhile.

After we had eaten, James was allowed to play a little longer and then it was nap time.  Sam had slept earlier, so their naps were not going to coincide.  My husband decided to work on the Jeep, and I put James to bed.  Well...James has now learned that he can get out of bed on his own and play or leave his room.  I had to return him to his room about four times, and he was playing loudly in his room for over an hour before I went in and told him nap time was over.  He was excited to be done.  I am hopeful it was just an exciting day, and James hasn't given up naps completely.

***I'm thankful my son is able to be mobile and get into mischief even if it makes it harder on me.

I was so busy during the "nap time" making sure James stayed in his room I forgot all about the corn casserole I was supposed to make to take to Thanksgiving dinner, so I threw it together really fast and got it in the oven.  Right now Sam is down for another nap, and James and my husband are outside riding their bikes together even with it sprinkling a little.

***I am thankful I still have enough time to get the corn casserole baked before we have to leave the house (although just barely).
***I am thankful Sam is getting the sleep he needs, so hopefully we will only have one grumpy boy to contend with at our aunt's house.
***I am thankful once again that my husband is such a wonderful daddy.

I better get back to work.  I already packed the diaper bag, but I still need to put some toys aside to bring with us. 

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, everyone!!

Chocolate Chip Coffee Cake

http://bakedbree.com/chocolate-chip-coffee-cake

We had some company from out of state visit our home this morning.  I decided to put together something to have available...not only to make the house smell good but to offer to eat.  I settled on this recipe from the Baked Bree blog because I have loved her ice cream recipes in the past, and her pictures are so amazing!

Well...the house smelled delightful, and the result was a beautiful, delicious tasting coffee cake that everyone thoroughly enjoyed.  In fact when I had mentioned that I just pulled a coffee cake out of the oven, at first our guests were reluctant to have some because they had already eaten breakfast, but once my friend laid eyes on the coffee cake, she stated "Now that I've seen it, I will have to try some."  Then her and her husband both had seconds as well, so it must not have been too bad. ; )

I will definitely keep this recipe in mind for future use.  I love the cinnamon sugary taste, and the nice crunch it gives to the top of the cake.  Also the chocolate chips in the middle create a ribbon of chocolate throughout while the ones on top retain their shape.  It looks fancy, and it does take a little bit of time to put together, but it is not too bad.

One Car Family

Since my husband is swapping the transmission in the Jeep, we are currently a one car family for a little bit.  This is generally not a problem and has happened in the past as well.  However, today was a little interesting because Sam had his sibling visit scheduled for this morning, but my husband also had an important dr. appt. in the morning as well.  We ended having me drop my husband and James off at the dr. office with the jogging stroller on our way to Sam's visit.  They got there early for the appt., but they took a walk outside for a little bit before heading in.  Then my husband ran them home afterward.

Sam had his sibling visit which went as it normally does...both boys doing their own separate things for the duration.  Next we have a caseworker coming over for her monthly visit this afternoon and dinner at a friend's house.  A pretty busy day overall, I would say.

Toddler Bed

Last night James made the switch from crib to toddler bed.  We decided this week would be a good week to make the change because my husband has the entire week off work, so if we have to continually put James back into bed, it won't be interferring with my husband's work the next day. 

Originally we were going to put James straight into a twin bed, but my parents offered us the use of their blue race car toddler bed, and James loves race cars, so we went that route instead.  It is nice because James is excited about his new car bed, but also it allows us to continue using the twin bed (which is currently located in Sam's room) as a diaper changing station as well as a sleeping accomodation for guests (of course I wash the sheets and everything).

Well...last night we still had the crib in James room as well, so we gave him the choice of which bed he wanted to sleep in, and he choose the car.  We did his normal bedtime routine, and my husband tucked him into his bed.  James was heard playing in his bed for a good while before he finally fell asleep.  James managed to remain in his bed the entire night, and in the morning when he woke up, I could hear him playing in his bed again.  After he had been awake and playing for about five minutes, I knocked on his door and asked if I could come in.  James was all cute laying on his bed playing with his teddy bear.  He pointed at the crib and said "crib, get out", so I told him we could work on that today.

This morning my husband and I disassembled two cribs, moved the crib from James's room into Sam's room and put the one from Sam's room away (the crib from Sam's room was borrowed from my brother, so we wanted to make sure it was ready to return since we will no longer be needing it...at least at this point in time).

Nap time was a little more interesting today because even though James crawled into his bed with his teddy bear, he was talking about how he didn't want to go to sleep.  I did our normal naptime routine and left him in his room figuring he may decide to come out this time; however, he played a little bit and then fell asleep.  I peeked my head in to check on him, and he is fast asleep curled up in his bed with his arm around his teddy bear.

Needless to say, I am happy with how well the bed transition is going.  Granted it has only been one night and one nap, so who knows what is going to happen when James is more aware that he can leave his room when he wants.  Oh well...we will cross that bridge when it comes.

Absolutely Disgusting!

Now I have had my share of horrible diaper explosions and spit up city all over myself and practically everything else, but this surely takes the cake all around!  This morning I had a dr. appt., and I only had a short time to get ready.  I decided I would just use my manual toothbrush and do a quick brush before running out the door.  Well...I apply some toothpaste and start brushing.  You know how sometimes something doesn't seem right or you feel somehow you know there is something different, but it takes your brain a moment to catch up and clue your body in on what's going on?  That is what happened to me.  I thought to myself this tastes really strange...awful in fact.  Then my brain clued me in that the taste was throw up that had somehow not gotten dislodged from the toothbrush brittles from last Friday when I was sick due to my migraine headache.  I almost threw up right there!  Yuck!!  I quickly rinsed my mouth out, reapplied toothpaste to my electronic toothbrush and went to town in my mouth followed by a thorough gargling of mouth wash afterward.  Needless to say, that toothbrush winded up in the trash can.

In my whole lifetime I have never had that happen before!  Whenever I am sick and throw up, I always use a manual toothbrush to brush my teeth and get the nasty taste out.  Then I rinse the toothbrush really well when I am done.  Apparently I didn't do a good job rinsing this last time, and I don't think I will forget that anytime soon.  Disgusting!!

Lost Art Form

Usually I am really good about writing thank you cards.  In fact my own mother has told me that sometimes she and my dad roll their eyes and wonder why I am thanking them this time when a card comes in the mail...not quite the reaction I expect, but oh well.  Anyway...my birthday was back in September, and because of my surgery, I had some wonderful friends provide meals for my family around the same time.  I have written a few thank you cards, but I still have more to go.  The motivation is just not there.  I am determined the finish the ones I have left within the next couple days.

Just in general, though, it seems like thank you cards are a lost art form.  I rarely get thank you cards from other people.  On the same note, people are not sending paper invitations very much anymore either.  With Evite invitations can be sent without requiring paying for postage, so perhaps that is some of the draw.  I was shocked last year when I was invited to a kid's birthday party through text message.  Part of me misses the days of handwritten cards.  Hopefully I can continue pushing through and get out of the rut I am in.

Court Trial

We finally found out the results of the court trial scheduled for earlier this month.  Parental rights were terminated.  Now we just have to wait the sixty day appeal period; however, we are fairly certain an appeal will be filed.  If an appeal is filed, it will drag the process out another twelve months or so.  However, we are headed in the right direction of making Sam a legal member of our family.  : )

Birth dad's goodbye visit is approaching.  I didn't realize it was going to be the last visit, but I had already sent in some pictures to get developed for him since I have been sending them about once a month already.  I haven't figured out if there is anything else I should do for that visit or not...or if I even have the time to do anything else.

Also we found out from our worker that birth dad's girlfriend may be pregnant.  Our worker is going to look into it and see what the county is thinking will happen if she is pregnant and has the baby.  She wanted to give us a heads up that another baby might end up in care if we were interested.  I told her at this point, yes, we are willing to take any siblings of the two children we already have.

Kitty Cat

After dinner, the boys had baths, and then we dressed them in some warm pajamas and went for a family walk around the neighborhood.  Sam rode in the Bjorn, and James lead the way for everyone.  Along the way, we encountered a friendly orange cat.  Both the cat and James were quite fond of each other.  So much in fact that the cat kept following us wherever we went.  James would stop and wait until he could see the kitty cat again before continuing on the sidewalk.  That cat followed us all the way home and sat whining at our front door for a long while after we returned.  Luckily for us, someone driving past in a car mentioned it was their cat...we were a little nervous that we had met a stray and it was going to want to live with us.  It took over an hour for the cat to decide to wander away from our home.

It is amazing how something so simple can bring so much joy into a child's life.  And, if you are curious, no, we will not be getting a pet cat anytime in the near future.

Veteran's Day Parade

For the last four or five years, it has become tradition to attend the local Veteran's Day parade.  Last year James was so excited about everything, and this year did not disappoint with his excitement level.  Sam is a little young to appreciate much of the parade, but he did get a kick out of the go-carts and sirens...essentially the louder festivities.  One set of grandparents joined us for the parade as did my brother (who served in Iraq) and his family.  This is a simple way to introduce Veteran's Day to children, and one in which they enjoy and someday will appreciate all the more as they become old enough to understand what the day is for.

Thank you to everyone who has served to protect our country.  Also a BIG thank you for those who have sacrificed everything.  My heart goes out to the families that have lost a dear loved one.

My Kitchen Helper

It all started several months ago.  I was going to make brownies and decided James would probably enjoy helping me put the ingredients in the bowl and mix them up.  He did enjoy helping dump the measuring cups into the bowl and turn the mixer on, but his most favorite part, of course, was sampling the batter off the spatula and beater at the end.  : )

Since that time, I have often invited him into the kitchen to help me while I am baking something.  In fact, when James hears the mixer or the food processor start going, he will usually run into the kitchen to see what is happening.  My husband even had James help him bake a "Get Well Soon" cake for me while I was recovering from surgery.  That was huge because it required my husband to display lots of patience with our young, little helper, but they were a great team, and the cake was yummy.  Below is a picture of their creation.

I thought it was cute James wanted to help so much in the kitchen, and he is learning some skills.  However, now it seems like every time I am in the kitchen, James wants to be in the room with me assisting.  Even when I am prepping dinner, I get a pint sized helper ready to start working.  I will give him a butter knife and let him help me cut up the veggies, or he will help measure the brown rice for me or whatnot.

I honestly don't mind having a little helper, but it gets tricky finding appropriate ways for James to assist.  Also it makes it almost impossible to prepare a meal on my own.  I find that I need to expect James to help, so I need to think ahead and figure out how James can aid in the food preparation, and I need to make sure I am patient and understanding.  Last night James even gave up playing with Daddy (rough housing) to come in and help make dinner.

What a sweet little boy I have!  I wonder how long James will enjoy being Mommy's Little Chef.

Strider Balance Bike

For James's second birthday, we bought him a bright green Strider balance bike.  He had been so upset at Christmas because his cousin (who was five at the time) got a new bike, and James had thrown the biggest fit about it because he wanted one.  My husband and I decided to look into bikes for his birthday.  Well...James is on the smaller size, and none of the bikes would really work well for him, and after all the research, we decided to settle on a balance bike.  We decided on a Strider brand because it was the best fit for our small boy.  Supposedly a child can go straight from a balance bike to a regular bike without needing the training wheels since they already have the balance portion down.

James was so excited to get a bike on his birthday.  He walked it around all over the place.  For the longest time, James would just walk the bike around without even sitting on the seat.  Then he slowly started to sit down on the seat and walk around.  Once he realized he went faster sitting down, he began to regularly sit down on the seat while riding it.  Most recently, James has started to pull his feet up and ride the bike for short bursts.  He actually started that awhile ago, but not until recently has he been more consistent and purposeful in this attempt.

James is so proud of himself, and I am amazed at how well he does on the balance bike.  This morning there were times I had to start jogging to catch up with him because he has gotten so fast!

I highly recommend a balance bike to other parents.  It has been amazing!

Little Daredevils

I have always known that James is a little daredevil...ever since he was pretty young.  He has always been very interested in climbing, jumping and doing all sorts of complicated moves.  It looks like Sam is planning to join the ranks as a little daredevil as well.  I guess the boys will be in competition for everything.  : )  I'm just kidding, of course...although I do expect some competition in their lives...it's normal for siblings. 

Today we went to the "sand park" as James has dubbed it since it has a large sand area with a cool front loader sand toy for kids to play on.  This is a great park because Sam can maneuver the playground fairly well, and he likes the sand too.  Well...Sam decided to go headfirst down one of the smaller slides, and he landed right on his face in the bark.  He wasn't happy about that, but once he was brushed off and given a little comfort, he was ready to try his luck at the slide again.  From that point forward, I was more aware when Sam was close to the slide and would be prepared to help him slide down.

This is not the only example of Sam as a daredevil.  He climbs absolutely everything he can at home.  There have been times he has high centered himself on an object and needs assistance getting down.  He has even managed to get himself stuck in the bottom basket of the stroller a time or two! 

With James as his role model, I am sure the stunts will get even more intense as Sam learns to walk.  Both boys will egg each other on, I am sure!

Thankful

I know Thanksgiving is still a couple weeks away, but there are reasons to be thankful all the time.  I plan on listing 10 things I am grateful for.

1. I am thankful I am married to such a wonderful husband, a gentleman and a terrific father to our children!   He is amazing with our boys, and he steps in and helps out around the house when he can.  I will be greatly pleased if our boys turn out like their dad!

2. I am thankful that God has blessed our family with two of the most adorable boys in the world!  Our lives wouldn't be complete with James and Sam.  Granted, Sam is not an official member of the family just yet, but in our hearts he most certainly is.

3. I am thankful my husband and I planned ahead and made good financial decisions that allowed me to stay home to raise our children.  This has always been a dream of mine since I was a young child. 

4. I am thankful both of our families (my husband's and mine) live nearby and are excited to be involved in our children's lives.

5. I am thankful our church has a wonderful children's program starting from nursery all the way through the teenage years.

6. I am thankful we have a roof over our heads and food to fill our tummies every day. 

7. I am thankful I have a group of friends who offer support to my family (play dates, sending meals when I had surgery, listening and seeming to actually care about all the confusing adoption stuff).

8. I am thankful my appendix didn't burst!  I cannot even imagine how much worse shape I would have been in.  The recovery was hard enough as it was.  

9. On that note, I am thankful to be alive!

10. I am thankful my life is in God's hands.

 

Daylight Savings Time

Usually when Daylight Savings Time comes around, and we have to either move clocks forward or backward, it really messes up our family's routine...especially for the boys...well James in particular.  This morning, though, James actually slept in compared to normal, and I thought it was a little odd but was happy nonetheless.  Well...he was really content and happy to play with Sam on the floor, and James was in a super good mood.  Then all of a sudden, James became really clingy...he wanted to be held by Mommy or Daddy, and he didn't want to be put down at all.  I realized his forehead felt a little warm, so I took his temperature, and the poor guy had a fever...no wonder he slept so well and was being super clingy.  James had spurts of his normal self throughout the day, but for the most part (especially once his fever reducer medicine kicked in), you could tell he was sick by how much comfort he wanted and how little he ate.  We made sure to take his temperature and give him more medicine before bed.  Sam felt like he might be starting to get warm as well, but so far there is no high temperature for him.  I always feel so bad for my boys when they are sick.

I am thinking I will need to call and cancel Sam's sibling visit this week since James is sick, and Sam very well may be sick within the next day or two.  We can probably just reschedule for next week or something.  This is one of those circumstances that cannot really be worked around.

Birthday Celebration

Lately during James's imaginative play (which is darling to see, by the way), James will start singing "Happy Birthday" and pretending to blow out a candle.  Today should be pretty exciting for him then because we are having an aunt over to celebrate her birthday.  Her birthday was technically last weekend, but this afternoon worked better for everyone.

Last night I baked a dark chocolate cake.  It is filled with a peanut butter frosting and then covered in a rich chocolate frosting.  Unfortunately, I forgot to put some peanut butter frosting aside to decorate the top with, but it will still be tasty.  We are going to make some delicious homemade vanilla bean ice cream to go with the cake. 

I already made sure we have a candle available as well since that is James's favorite part.  James sure is going to love birthday celebrations this year...especially his own!

So Considerate

In the past when Sam would fall asleep, James would put his face close to the baby's and yell or make loud noises in order to wake him back up.  Sam, of course, would be terrified and start crying.  This would not happen all the time, but it did happen every once in awhile.  Lately James has become much more considerate of others.  Today when Sam fell asleep in the stroller on our walk, and we returned home, James saw that Sam was asleep, and he put his finger up to his lips and said "Shhh! Sam is asleep!" and tiptoed all cute like around the stroller. 

This also happened last weekend while we were at a harvest party.  We had gone inside the house to feed Sam and change diapers.  James saw that his aunt was asleep, and he did the whole tiptoe and "shhh!" thing.  So sweet!

Attorney Representative

We met Sam's attorney representative yesterday.  She came out to investigate for the attorney...basically to ask questions about how Sam is settling into our family.  We went over lots of growth and development type milestones and discussed how James is doing with Sam.  She also wanted to know if we had good support in place, so I told her about my moms group, our church, and our family.  We were asked if we felt we needed more support, but we told her we felt we had plenty of support.

The representative also agreed with our adoptions worker that at this point in time...everyone (Sam's attorney, the county, etc.) is wanting to push Sam through to be adopted.  The trial is more of a formality than anything else.  She also mentioned that our county adoptions worker just raved about my husband and myself...so if nothing else, I am happy that the county seems to like working with us.

While the attorney representative was here, she asked about the sibling visits and whether we were willing to and felt comfortable continuing them after adoption.  I explained that we feel sibling bonds are really important and will be especially good for the boys as they get older.  I also then went on to say we are comfortable meeting with the other mom as long as we take safety precautions since the other mom seems to have more contact with the birth parents than we are comfortable with.  She understood that concern and said she would address it with the attorney.

It will be nice when parental rights are terminated, but in reality, it will be such a celebration when the adoption date finally comes around!  : )  It has been such a crazy ride this go around compared with James.  I will be happy when our family is official, and there isn't worry and stress about what may come next.

Adoptions Worker

Our county adoptions worker seems to think the court trial this month is just a formality.  Based off the birth dad's progress in his original case plan and how he is handling life at the moment, she believes the court will most likely be terminating parental rights when the trial comes.  We all assume that birth dad will be filing an appeal to that decision when and if it comes.  I cannot see him declining to submit paperwork for an appeal...after all he has already requested a trial, and he keeps telling people that he will be getting Sam back.  If parental rights are terminated, and an appeal is filed, it will essentially slow the process down by about six months or more.  I was hoping Sam's adoption would take place in the early part of next year, but at this point in time I am not sure anymore.  It would be neat if we could have Sam dedicated at church the same time James was.  Our church does baby dedications twice a year, around Christmas and around Father's Day.  We already figured we would be missing the December option because we have the sixty day appeal period to wait out after rights are terminated.  James was dedicated Father's Day weekend...it would be neat if the same held true for Sam.  However, we will be grateful whenever the dedication takes place.

The county worker also talked about putting in a request to end the sibling visits.  Who knows if the courts will grant that request or not...generally sibling visits continue until one or the other is adopted.  My worker says that since the boys have never lived together, and they are so young, the courts may decide to stop sibling visits.  If that was the case, it would be up to the other mom and myself to set up our own visits.

On top of all of this, I checked online today, and birth mom is currently incarcerated.  She should be released soon.  I wonder if she will want to start having visits again or not.  The main reason she stopped was because there was a warrant out for her arrest.  However, she didn't even want to hold Sam at her last visit, so I am not sure what her thoughts are on all of this.

It is so weird to have a set of birth parents involved.  I wish circumstances were different because under our current circumstances there is no way an open adoption would be beneficial to anyone.  I mean...we have been told repeatedly not to go to court because they do not want us to meet the birth parents, and after the stories we have heard, I think it is wise we haven't met them...for our family's safety, if nothing else.  It's such a sad, confusing world we live in.

I will say I am grateful and truly blessed to have my two precious, sweet little boys in my life.  I love them as my own and always will.

Different Dads

Today I took my boys to the park to play with some of our friends from our moms group.  A lot of the moms in the group already know my story...how our family chose foster/adopt as the way to add members to our family.  Most of them were there to hear the news of James's adoption.  However, the group is continually growing as new moms join.  Today I was pushing Sam in the baby swing while another mom pushed her little one in the swing next to us.  Every once in awhile I would glance around to make sure I could spot James.  When the mom realized James belonged to me, she seemed quite surprised.  Then she turned to me and said "Your boys have different dads, huh?"  I just answered "yes" because truthfully they do; however, I was a little taken aback...I am not even sure why...I guess it just came across weird to me.  I then went on to explain to the other mom a little bit of our story of how we became a family.

I am not sure if I told the story because I didn't want her to think I slept around with different men, because I wanted to inform her since we may see each other a lot at the play date, or because I was trying to make adoption a more familiar topic.  Another comment that was made was "I would have never guessed James was your son".  In all reality there is nothing to take offense in throughout this whole conversation.  I guess I should expect more comments now that I am mom to a bi-racial boy and a little red headed child, and perhaps that is why I was thrown off.  When it was just James and me out and about, everyone probably just assumed I had a black husband and didn't think twice about it...unless they saw the whole family out together, I suppose.  Now I need to prepare myself to deal with comments that may come across as rude to me, and in doing so, I will also be preparing my children for how to deal with similar situations.  Thankfully this whole conversation took place in front of Sam who is too little to understand rather than in front of James. 

Yes, my boys have different dads.  In fact they have different moms as well.  However, they are a part of our family, and I am their mom, and my husband is their dad, and they are our most precious sons.  I hope one day our boys will believe that as well.

Little Trick-or-Treater

Last night we had a low key evening.  One set of grandparents came over to join us for our homemade pumpkin shaped pizzas.  The boys were dressed as Batman and Robin...too cute!  James, aka Batman, didn't want to put his costume on last night at first because he had already worn it twice to two other Halloween parties, and he wasn't happy about wearing it again.  However, he did want to get candy from the houses, so he was convinced to don his costume one last time.  We just walked Batman and Robin down the street by our house since James is still young and not really into the whole thing.  It was a good idea too because James had reached his max after four houses.  He wanted Daddy to hold him...he would set his pumpkin bucket down and back away from the door.  However, for the houses he actually said "trick-or-treat" and "thank  you" it was precious to watch.  He is growing up way too fast!  Sam just went along for the walk...we didn't collect candy for him.  : )